After his successful acquisition of Twitter, the world’s richest man has set his sights on Lexington’s beloved Ring Tum Phi. This most recent update leaves only The Radish as a trustworthy source of news, and The Spectator as the school’s sole satire publication. “He just walked onto campus and gave me a truck with a … Continue reading Elon Musk Purchases the Ring Tum Phi
“It’s false advertising is what it is,” commented Timmy Wimbledon, one such aggravated participant. “The event is called Sex in the Dark, but when I showed up with the entirety of my Alpha Phi pledge class, there was not a single person having sex.”
Over the summer, the women of Omicron Omicron Rho were more than a little surprised to find that their beloved sister, international student Cora Njoroge, owned more than just sorority pride shirts and the newest model of the Vitamix machine. Njoroge invited her favorited sisters to an all-expenses-paid-for vacation in her home country of Kenya … Continue reading Exposé: International student revealed to have “unpaid laborers” in home country
On the morning of Saturday, September 24th, Washington and Lee University students woke up to a shocking incident. The annual fall tradition—big ASS blocks in front of Elrod Commons—was desecrated once again as students rearranged the letters to spell something far more lewd: SSA. Kelsey Goodwin, former Director of Student Activities at Washington and Lee … Continue reading Yearly Prank: Students rearrange “ASS” blocks to spell “SSA”
W&L’s student organization opposed to abortion rights announced a new “Chastity Week” to oppose SHAG’s yearly Sex Week extravaganza. “Remember the kid that hung up posters of a crusader knight in the library? That was actually our theme drop,” said Sam Austin, class of ‘23 and president of the club. The new event will be … Continue reading Students for Life Announce “Chastity Week”
Facing a lack of students willing to stand up for their beliefs, the student-run, alumni-bankrolled publication The Spectator announced it will open letters of opinion to alumni so that parents of Spectator staff can prove dumb liberals wrong. Chris Pratt (no relation), editor in chief of The Spectator, announced the changes at a meeting of … Continue reading Spectator opens letters to Alumni
Daniel Starr, Class of 2025, was found to be hip, relatable and cool when leading his Volunteer Venture trip to Washington State during Pre-Orientation, now termed “Leading Edge” for some reason. “I know the froshies were scared when we were on the bus to the place, but I yelled ‘noice’ every time we passed a … Continue reading Pre-O Leader Really Cool and Relatable
With COVID-19 vaccinations on the rise across both the nation and our beloved campus, thestaff of the Radish have noted the near institutional-level suppression of one minority’sculturally-rich message. As public servants, the men, women, and non-gender conformingmembers of this publication refuse to stand for this slanted misrepresentation currently beingperpetuated by mass media. We firmly believe … Continue reading The Anti-Vaxer Agenda
In a surprise turn of events, the Washington and Lee Men’s Soccer team has formally banned a fan from attending their practices. This comes roughly a week after Rockbridge County resident Leeroy Hunter, 80, showed up uninvited to one of their team meetings. The news of no soccer this fall devastated Hunter, who has been … Continue reading Breaking News: Men’s Soccer Bans Elderly Admirer From Practices
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