Scorpio (Oct. 23 - Nov. 1): It's Scorpio Season, so celebrate! Take some deserved 'you' time and scar yourself with a solo horror movie screening. Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21): The Sun will be moving into your house of mystery, meaning that no one will recognize your costume and you'll be left explaining the … Continue reading Your Horoscopes — Week of October 26, 2017
MAIN STREET, LEXINGTON — Gremlins, goblins, ghouls, and just about anything else available in bulk order from Amazon Prime will be, once again, on makeup-smeared display this weekend, having somehow lost the original sense of magic that went with the costume. A sight as unique as it is annual, the trek is also expected to … Continue reading Fantastic assortment of mythical creatures to constitute weekend’s walk of shame
It’s that time of year again. The pressure to have that group costume consisting of the perfect mix between funny and creative is, tragically, almost upon us. And no matter how many times you suggest Mother Teresa, your hyper-politically (religiously?) correct friends just will not have it. No one wants to cover their body with … Continue reading Friend groups crumble across campus as Halloween and demand for group costumes lingers closer
While fall for many inspires cheerful thoughts of changing foliage, Halloween, and family touch-football-soon-leading-to-sprained-ankles backyard contests, the change of seasons here at W&L is remarkable for a much different reason. Akin to the animal kingdom, where animals grow a little extra fluff to keep warm for brisk fall breeze, local sorority girls everywhere are swamping … Continue reading Fall in Lexington Leads to Global Shortage in Barbour Jackets, Lululemon Leggings, and Bean Boots
NEW YORK CITY, NY — Citing a recent dip in ratings, the NFL announced Thursday that it will be banking on shorter, sexier pants next season to boost viewership. “Let’s not kid ourselves, gentlemen — no one watches this sport for the game itself. Women’s football is where the real skill is, anyway. We’re all … Continue reading NFL banking on shorter, sexier pants to boost viewership
Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22): Your fiscal house will light up this week, along with your credit card fraud alerts. Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 1): Overambitious Mars will bring the urge for a fresh look, but Lexington is not known for its tattoo parlors. Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21): Your eleventh house … Continue reading Your Horoscopes — Week of October 19, 2017
Awkward laughs ensued this past Wednesday night as junior Winston Kingsley dropped a painfully real joke amongst his Sigma Alpha Delta fraternity brothers. "Gotta make sure we drink that Busch Light," he laughed as he filled his solo cup with some fine libation, chorusing that "empty calories are basically zero calories, right?” His friends laughed … Continue reading Area junior makes uneasy “Freshman Fifteen” joke to downplay growing gut
In the latest development of the recent Russian hacking scandals, GreekRank - a website that allows students to rank their Greek affiliated peers according to essential criteria like looks, classiness, and popularity - was found to be compromised by a system of Kremlin-sponsored bots. While frequently suspected that the accuracy of overall ratings was being negatively affected by self-ranking, a recent Congressional probe into … Continue reading 90% of GreekRank commenters discovered to be Russian Bots
Franklin Petraefus, 19, returned to his home in Richmond, VA, to find an unexpected amount of maturity and experience awaiting him from his former high school acquaintances. Frankin, a formerly mild-mannered young man, was excited to tell his “old best friends” how “cool" he had become, only to discover that each of them had stories … Continue reading Freshman returns home, surprised to find high school friends have changed, too
The Radish 