On March 21st, 2023, Mock Con hosted former vice president Mike Pence and Fox News anchor Bret Baier at the University Chapel for their kickoff event. While the event itself was a raging success for Pence’s new standup comedy tour featuring Bret Baier’s legendary Trump impersonation, perhaps the biggest political bombshell in recent history came … Continue reading Pence’s Classified Documents Found on Campus
Category: Clubs & Sports
Climate Change singlehandedly prevented by frat bro recycling can at Windfall
Scientists around the world breathed a sigh of relief this Friday night as James Blake, Class of 2025, single handedly prevented climate change by recycling his natty lite at Windfall. “Our goal, of course, has been to keep planetary warming below 1.5 degrees celsius above pre-industrial levels,” said Nick Baker, chief scientist at the United … Continue reading Climate Change singlehandedly prevented by frat bro recycling can at Windfall
Hand Foot and Mouth Disease Back Again You Dirty Little Freaks
Far be it for us here at The Radish to kink shame, but public hygiene has once again taken a grievous hit. For the twenty-sixth time in the past four years, Hand Foot and Mouth (HFM) Disease has re-emerged. In fact, in a recent press release from the CDC, the W&L campus was cited as … Continue reading Hand Foot and Mouth Disease Back Again You Dirty Little Freaks
Bald Headed Roulette: Swimmer, VMEE, or Skinhead?
Imagine you’re walking across campus from the parking deck (that never actually has parking) to get to your first class of the day. As you pass the beloved Elrod Commons, you begin to lose your ability to see. You now realize that a ray of sunshine hits you in the eyes, as a result of … Continue reading Bald Headed Roulette: Swimmer, VMEE, or Skinhead?
Gaines vs Graham Lees: A Debate or a Pickup Line?
Picture this: You're a freshman on Windfall Hill during O-week at one of your first college parties. You're having fun (don't worry these parties get old fast) and you're dancing with a group of your friends to Pitbull or some other 2010's hip-hop song. Suddenly, an older frat-dude approaches you and discovers that you are … Continue reading Gaines vs Graham Lees: A Debate or a Pickup Line?
Omega Kappa completely revamped after brother takes WGSS course
Omega Kappa brother Johnathan Greenbrook, class of 2024, has been at the spearhead of a campaign to completely overhaul the historic fraternity after he accidentally signed up for a Women, Gender and Sexuality Studies (WGSS) course this past Fall Term. “I took it initially because I saw the word sex, and I thought to myself … Continue reading Omega Kappa completely revamped after brother takes WGSS course
My Rush Memoirs – Hazing in Upsilon Xi Omicron
When I enrolled at Washington and Lee, I was confident that their anti-hazing program would protect me from the worst excesses of Greek life. After doing quizzes on my phone to determine whether or not beating someone for not doing chores counted as hazing, I knew no one on campus would be able to get … Continue reading My Rush Memoirs – Hazing in Upsilon Xi Omicron
Testosterone from Abroad: Greek Org Fosters Inclusivity and Multi-level Marketing
As the administration moves forward with their goal to “stop talking about goddamn Robert E. Lee,” the Admissions Office has made a concerted effort to attract additional international students to the university. As President Dudley put it in his latest address to the student body, “international students’ unique perspectives, work ethic, and limited knowledge of … Continue reading Testosterone from Abroad: Greek Org Fosters Inclusivity and Multi-level Marketing
Elon Musk Purchases the Ring Tum Phi
After his successful acquisition of Twitter, the world’s richest man has set his sights on Lexington’s beloved Ring Tum Phi. This most recent update leaves only The Radish as a trustworthy source of news, and The Spectator as the school’s sole satire publication. “He just walked onto campus and gave me a truck with a … Continue reading Elon Musk Purchases the Ring Tum Phi