Student Affairs reveals University Improvement Plan; relocating campus to Massachusetts 

In celebration of the one-year anniversary of third year housing, known behind closed doors as ‘Phase One,’ Student Affairs unveiled the rest of its much-anticipated university improvement plan designed to fix major stylistic issues present at Washington & Lee. A relatively mundane Phase Two is the construction of senior housing, also expediently built and capable of accommodating … Continue reading Student Affairs reveals University Improvement Plan; relocating campus to Massachusetts 

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Conceding to national moral decline, EC cuts funding for Mudd Center for Ethics

Last week, the Executive Committee decided that, in an age where alternative facts and moral degradation have rapidly become the status quo, there is no point in sustaining funding for the Mudd Center for Ethics, an organization which now contradicts national culture. “I know it sounds like the glass is half empty,” said EC member … Continue reading Conceding to national moral decline, EC cuts funding for Mudd Center for Ethics

Fake news comes to W&L: an investigation into a parody news site

This week, a watchdog organization has begun an investigation into an online student journalistic sensation known as the Radish, calling into question the site's accuracy and dependence (despite our cherished tradition of excellence in news reporting). The coalition, known as the General Repertoire Against Bogus Electronic Media (GRAB 'EM), has taken a stand in solidarity … Continue reading Fake news comes to W&L: an investigation into a parody news site

VDOT to triple number of 18-wheelers on I-81 to Lexington because fuck you

“Yeah, you heard me. Fuck you, in particular, you sack of shit,” Virginia Department of Transportation President Mike Dorvino said in a statement earlier today, reportedly aimed specifically at you. Upon being asked for clarification, Dorvino made an obscene gesture, made fun of the fact that you didn’t go anywhere cool for February Break, and … Continue reading VDOT to triple number of 18-wheelers on I-81 to Lexington because fuck you

Cash-strapped Clinton excitedly accepts Contact Committee offer to speak on campus

Mock Convention proved to W&L that the “road to the White House” did indeed run “through our house.” Students will soon see that the road away from the White House also runs through our house. In what seemed to be an antiquated Goldman Sachs speakers contract, her fee appeared to had been penciled down by … Continue reading Cash-strapped Clinton excitedly accepts Contact Committee offer to speak on campus

Punxsutawney Phil sees his shadow; Steve Bannon confirms climate change is a myth

Last week America’s sweetheart, Punxsutawney Phil-appointed over his daughter Ivanka by Donald Trump-saw his shadow in the Pennsylvania town that’s historic for no reason. According to rich American culture, the shadow sighting means winter will last for another six weeks regardless of anyone’s thermal observations. Steve Bannon, Trump’s chief strategist and former Breitbart News executor, … Continue reading Punxsutawney Phil sees his shadow; Steve Bannon confirms climate change is a myth

Fearing uncertain future of family private islands, area white females join demonstration against Trump Travel Ban

Following President Trump’s recent security-first executive order, many students showed their discontent by taking to the Colonnade. For many, the inspirational speeches, rallying, and protesting showed their support for friends and family members whose status in America may soon become hazy. For an unexpected “squad” of affluent white females, however, one point was continually reiterated … Continue reading Fearing uncertain future of family private islands, area white females join demonstration against Trump Travel Ban