Ranking the Doors of Campus

We tested every door- the sliding, the French, the double, and the just plain massive- on on campus to bring you this official ranking, accompanied by equivalent weights.

Commons entryways: equivalent to a yogurt bowl with every available topping
Leyburn entrance: relative to the size and grade weight of the assignment(s) you’ve procrastinated on
the CGL interior doors: equal to the latent anxiety caused by the narrow stairwell
Graham Lees side door: the same size as your overstuffed laundry bag
the CGL front doors: reminiscent of the dread of Spring Term registration
Tucker Hall entrance: roughly equivalent to the mass of the unknown universe
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