Trusted source leaks that Apple will replace eggplant emoji with actual human phallus in iOS 11

Apple announced the surprise move as an attempt to keep pace with more demanding younger owners. Focus groups have shown that Tinder users especially laud the addition, removing any uncertainty from early morning check-ins. In the interest of diversity, Apple has promised to make the actual human phallus available in the full spectrum of skin tones. –Ford Carson

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