Eulogy to Pizza at Coop

In this season of love letters and joyous celebrations of our dining services, I seek to offer a eulogy to one of the fine dining options served here on campus in better times – Pizza at Coop. 

Served exclusively in 2020-2021, Coop pizza (hereafter referred to by its affectionate nickname Coozza) was the best cooked pizza in Lexington which originated from being frozen and wrapped in plastic. In contrast to Sheetz and Salerno’s, Coozza was welcome. It even punched above its weight, occasionally outdoing D-Pizza at D-Hall. However, Coozza was too good to last for long in this cruel world. 

Despite the fact we pay the cost of a small house every year to attend this institution, W&L has a tradition of destroying the small joys of dining. Coozza was replaced by hot dogs, disgusting meat sticks which can be made without the fancy oven they use at Cafe 77. COVID removed our monogrammed waffles, disease struck down self-serve buffets, and veganism replaced our vaguely Asian third year option just as the dinosaurs were struck down in their prime by an asteroid. 

W&L’s wheel of destruction rolls along, plotting the downfall of more beloved snacks. The closure of Dhall and Coop for “renovations” is a thinly veiled cover for the removal of our favorite foods, with the ultimate goal of allowing first years to make lines at Hillel even worse. 

Let us then mourn those we have lost – but more importantly fight for those that remain. Loaded fries? Buffalo Bites? That burger made of donuts? W&L can pry these out of my cold, dead, greasy hands. 

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