Worst Things to Write in a Love Letter

“From the day we met …”
That was two days ago at 1:00am, and they were too drunk to remember it well.

“I love you.”
Cliché, overrated, sounds like a parent.

“[Your name]”
Just a precaution so they can’t sue you.


Song lyrics
Technically an honor violation, and they will report you to the EC.

“I get butterflies in my stomach when I see you”
If you like to eat butterflies, keep it to yourself.

“I just wanted you to know how I feel before I graduate”
Don’t set the poor, innocent freshmen up for heartbreak.

“When I look in your eyes…”
Keep your eyes closed when you kiss. Really, it’s so weird.

Output from ChatGPT
It might be better than anything you come up with, but you’ll never have to be depressed about that if you never compare.

“Will you be my valentine?”
They will shoot an arrow through your heart.

Arun Ghosh