“Only one more week!” exclaims sweating, pale senior

Having just consumed The Last Supper® with the squad, senior Anne Jamison returned to the nicest room she’d inhabit for the next decade, beginning the days-long process of stuffing everything she owned in sad little cardboard boxes. Everything, that is, that she couldn’t pawn off to an unsuspecting sophomore as a “moving out deal.” A stained couch, an old futon, and a bed spread for just $25? Sign me up.

Jamison, moving to Podunk City, Indiana in July to pursue an indentured servitude in broadcast journalism, expressed a strong desire to return to campus once, twice, or “hell, even a few times” for a side-hug tour of all the juniors she still recognized at Windfall. Knowing that she’d quickly be moving from the top of the social totem pole to the absolute, definitive bottom at her new job, Jamison has reportedly also been making a keen effort to have farewell coffee dates with the top 20 contacts on her Snapchat.

Jamison, with only a few days left until graduation, fondly recalled her activity on campus for this reporter, including FeelGood and, well, yeah. FeelGood. See you at Young Alumni Weekend.