Guy with Vineyard Vines laptop sticker “definitely” going to be at Windfall tonight

A junior from South Carolina (probably named, like, Hunter or something) divulged his night’s plans to a group of fraternity men on earlier today.

Sources from The Radish report that Hunter was sitting in Commons, eating some “pretty critical for the hangover I’ve got today” loaded fries, when he was approached by a couple of The Boys™.

“Will we see you at Windfall tonight?”

“Oh, definitely, bro. Like for sure. No doubt, man. Wouldn’t miss it,” said Hunter, tilting his laptop so that his American flag Vineyard Vines whale sticker could catch the light just so. With Southern Tide and Outing Club stickers on his water bottle, he felt pretty confident about having covered all his bases.

The 5’6” former middle school basketball player plans to pay a visit to Windfall Hill in his signature semi-obscure basketball jersey and ankle Nike socks, a bold move considering the recent drop in temperatures and high chance of rain this weekend.

“This guy knows what’s up,” sophomore fraternity member Aaron Summers said to literally no one.

-Hannah Dewing ‘19