“Czech-Lex” Parent’s Weekend Party Draws Attendance of Three

“We cannot speak to deliberations regarding any internal activities,” a spokesperson for the student activities committee responded in the aftermath of the failed event.

Czech-Lex was described as an effort to counter popular state-themed parents’ weekend events with a school-sponsored party for students from Czechoslovakia. No students are currently enrolled from the Eastern European nation.

The Czech-Lex menu, catered by the Marketplace, featured traditional dishes such as garlic soup, goulash, baked mincemeat, and Moravian sparrow. “It was nasty as hell, man,” one cook said. “We spent all morning on that freak stuff and had to throw it all out a few hours later. No one touched it. But a couple guys took some sparrow home and called in sick the next day.”

The student activities committee says that Czech-Lex will not be a part of the festivities next year. However, plans are already in the works for a “Lexembourg” party for next year, although it remains unclear if any students from Luxembourg will be enrolled. “We learned our lessons this year with Czech-Lex and feel confident about how we can take these lessons and apply them to a truly successful party for next year,” the spokesperson said.

— Cole Heisner ’21