The elusive out-of-town girlfriend of that guy on your hall has magically appeared for Fancy Dress. After nearly a year of existing only in vague mentions and the occasional tag in a Facebook meme, the out-of-town girlfriend arrived late last night from a school you can’t quite remember.
“I kind of thought she wasn’t real,” one freshman on the hall divulged. “I think we found her Instagram a couple times, but there were really no personal details about her, ever.”
The out-of-town girlfriend appeared out of nowhere, whisking down the hall to settle into the room of the boyfriend who has barely mentioned her. “I accidentally said hi because she kind of looked like a student here,” one first year, who requested to remain anonymous, said. “She’s weirdly familiar, even though I’ve never seen him post a photo with her.”
The out-of-town girlfriend is reportedly “so excited” to meet all of that guy-on-your-hall’s friends this weekend. If past Fancy Dress reporting remains accurate, the out-of-town girlfriend will spend most of her time at the cocktail party making small talk with other dates from nearby schools, random friends from home, and that kid who may or may not go here.
The Radish 